"was and will will make you ill"

would you have loved me then
at my lowest point
let my icy hands roam your skin
would you have kissed my bleeding arms
and let those scars wrap themselves around you
brushed away my tears with your lips
and stilled my trembling heart
would you have made love to me then
in flesh so taut you could see yourself move inside me
would you have loved me then

will you love me now
when the darkness seethes behind my eyes
and the past creeps up upon me
when the scars won't fade
and my demons will not let me rest
even in the still of your arms
will you love me now
when still no sound will pass my lips
and even you cannot fill my empitness
will you love me now

i take a gramme and only am
and perhaps someday won't be
i will envelop myself
leave no shadow behind
save our memory